Inside the Black Box

Long time, no word, eh? Sorry ‘bout that.

Courtesy of a bit of good luck and some impressive generosity on the part of my elder brother I ended up with a voucher for a meal for two at Dakota Bar and Grill. Don’t recognize the name? It’s the huge, sinister, black, boxy tower of a hotel just off the Forth Bridge (where I am as I write these words, in fact). Got it now?

Anyway, to the meal. Following a cold and wet time watching the Scottish rugby team claim victory over the Fijian team my girlfriend and I donned some finer clothes and headed over to the site. On entry the restaurant is a bit confusing. To go left or to carry on straight, or to just wait in the lounging area?

Luckily a chirpy, unusually finely dressed member of staff materialized, took our names and coats, and ushered us to our seats.

Décor: Dimly lit areas separated by floor-to-ceiling wine racks populated with dark wood tables and black armchairs. Dark and modern, with a soupcon of pretension.

Once we had settled into our place, a waitress came by with some preposterously large menu cards, a wine list, and some lovely little crunchy breadsticks with sundried tomato pesto and anchovy and olive dips to whet the appetite. Then a bit of sourdough – not amazing by any stretch but any establishment serving sourdough gets some credit – just before the starters or crab and walnut toast rolled in (not literally).

Starter: Crab terrine with walnut toast – Very impressed with the thin, nut laden walnut toast but a bit underwhelmed by the crab. Provided something to put on the delightful toast though.

The plates were swept away as soon as I’d devoured the last wisp of cress garnish and shortly after the mains appeared. It almost feels like being rushed through the meal but I was hungry, so I’ll forgive them.

Main: Lobster with a side of broccoli and hollandaise for me, ribeye steak for the lady – Ordering the lobster was a bit of an adventure for me. Never having had a trial run with the weapons designed to tackle such a shelled beast, nor indeed sampled lobster at all, this was a bold choice. But the voucher covered the costs and the event warranted some adventure on my part, so I went for it, fervrently hoping that I would not prove hopelessly inept when the food was placed in front of me.

I had no need to worry. The lobster was split down the middle, exposing much of the meat to my tame old knife and fork. The industrial grade claw-shaped lobster breaker made short work of the claws and, being well trained with nut crackers, I didn’t send any morsels of expensive seafood sailing across the table. Tasty stuff, but I wouldn’t go around paying over the odds for the stuff personally. Broccoli was good, if a bit cooler than I might of liked. The generous portion of fries that arrived with the crustacean were top-notch. Crunchy, salted to perfection, and very moreish.

My kind girlfriend even donated the tail end of her steak to bolster my protein intake. Very fine steak it was too. Enough to make me question my choice of main, but not for more than a few seconds.

The animals devoured, the towers of fries demolished, the time came for the dessert menu. Ahhhhh, yes.

Dessert: Tarte Tatin and Crème Bruleee for the lady - Apples, caramel, and pastry. Divine. A very good tarte tatin only let down by the fact that the caramelized sugar drizzled on the top stuck to my teeth like something that sticks very hard to teeth. I’m sure my girlfriend was a little bit ashamed at all my subsequent face pulling whilst trying to free my teeth of the tenacious dregs of my dessert. Her crème brulee was excellent too. Crème brulee is very rarely a let-down and the blowtorched top was completely textbook.

After some digestion we had the staff look out our coats and headed back out into the wintry cold of a Scottish November. Overall impression? Great if you’re not looking at a bill, but I think I’d be a bit more critical had it lightened my wallet to the tune of £85 without alcohol.

Roughing It Out

"Golf is a good walk spoiled." ~Mark Twain

Golf must have more quotes relating to it than any other sport. Most famous, as above, is by Mark Twain. Did I agree with him? I had to find out.

Myself and three other upstanding gentlemen unleashed a very special brand of terror on the unsuspecting Strathtyrum Golf Course: 4.50pm on that gorgeous Saturday evening saw the four of us (99% yours truly) slicing balls, hacking rough, breaking tees, and digging holes in sand pits (many apologies, bunkers).

I am no golfer, that much is sure. I need to focus on my technique - I have the most ridiculous swing ever allowed on a golf course and a grip that would make golf tutors worldwide weep. I think it can be summed up best by legendary golfer Sam Snead - "If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death." I'd probably gore fellow diners while I was at it, I certainly would've been a menace to many a golfer that day had my wise old friend not booked the last tee time possible.

After marching around in the rough for four and a half hours looking for my balls (ho ho - there is no was golf can be written about without leaving openings for innuendo) - the game was more a Where's Waldo (or Wally for the strange Brits) for golf balls - we claimed the 18th hole just before the sun called it a day.

I enjoyed myself - obviously it'd be more fun if I had tried a bit harder to learn - and disagree with Mark Twain. In this day and age it's hard enough to draw some people out of the house, yet alone to tramp for miles with heavy clubs (for those man enough to shoulder their own load) in all weathers. I believe it's an excuse for a walk flavoured with a bit of competition.

Maybe I'll get lessons, play a bit more, perhaps I won't. But I encourage you all not to stick your noses up. You might just have fun...

"Golf is so popular simply because it is the best game in the world at which to be bad." ~A.A. Milne

Tic Tac Toe

The first night, the 'tic' of the title, was the night at McChuills.

Hangover averted, work finished, I went for 'tac' in the form of some birthday pints in honour of my elder brother having survived another year. It was a casual night, and only mentioned here as the pints consumed with my brother topped up the beer and cider my liver was working overtime to banish from my body, a fact that comes into play foe 'toe', the mighty 3-in-a-row.

This came in the form of an annual birthday bash thrown by one of the musketeers of the Physics PGDE 2008 class. Set in England, I'm a relative newcomer to the proceedings, but it's worth every penny to make the effort to show at his shindig. This year was no exception.

I won't go into too much detail as it's not much in the spirit of the blog (the issue addressed in this post drinking three days in a row, but I'm really just posting to provide excuses for not getting out there for something more unusual [please note that such drinking is in no way usual for me - drink responsibly folks]). Let's just say that there were hats, drinking games, home-made cider and beer (that tasted delicious), various fun foods, and much laughter. Let's just say that the head start on blood alcohol didn't help my cause that evening. Plenty of water and a good sleep and I was as good as new. Talk about luck.

I think this post is losing the point, I'd better go. To wrap it up - don't follow my bad example kids. Even if I am wearing a nice shirt and keeping good company. Your liver appreciates the restraint.

One Night At McChuills

The Plan: Arrive home from work, change into some casual clothes, grab a pint in the local, West, with my flatmate and his friend, then off to dinner.

The Reality: On the train home with a bunch of shopping I get a text saying 'Meet in McChuills' with directions. In the spirit of the blog I hopped off the train and made my way to the new venue.

McChuills is a bit further from the flat than west, and looks a bit 'local' at first, but offered pool, cheaper drinks, and live music.

Having arrived to meet the first new face of the evening's proceedings, a primary teacher, I got a round and we claimed seats. Said teacher asked about the loaf of bread which represented the only article from the shop that refused to be put in my work bag. Banter was had.

The friend mentioned in The Plan shows up, a call centre worker, and more pints are had. The pool table clears and team pool commences, I gladly played the handicap to the better players. More new faces pile in - another call centre worker and a journalist. Drinks were drunk, banter was had.

We shifted back to the original table which, folding under the pressure of the occasion, collapsed, sending all the drinks sliding rapidly down the slope to the Australian in our midst. Miraculously he escapes unscathed along with my half-full pint (that's right, I'm a positive guy) and my flatmate's whiskey and coke. We physicists are looked upon kindly by the forces that are the bane of so many drinkers. The bar offers free drinks to replace the ones lost (or just for the hassle of having to shift from my seat to collect my errant pint in my case). An omen, for sure.

The rest of the night blazed by, filled with booze, another new face, banter ranging from the Australian Government's stance on Aboriginal culture to bread (bring a loaf of Weight Watcher's Brown Danish to a pub and you'll talk about it too). Eventually those with more sense made for home so as to be half sensible in work the next day. Time to hit the road.

To be honest though, that time had come long before, I just didn't notice. I had a man's share of booze coursing through my system and no dinner yet, at 12.30am. This was promptly rectified by a delightful kebab (shish, not donner - I wasn't that drunk yet), chips, and a fiery El Paso pizza from The Wishbone. Maybe it was hunger, maybe it was booze, maybe they just make amazing food, whatever the case may be, it was delightful.

And here, our night at McChuills ended. But for those who want closure on the story, here it is: Stagger home, drink water, sleep. I managed to avoid the hangover by some miracle and put in a good day's work the next day, but drinking on a weekday evening is a privilege that should be left to those who have holidays on the go or are students who have to drink on weekdays to take advantage of the deals. Yeah, this story has a moral. Whether or not I have heeded the lesson is left to be seen....

Cruisin' UK

Great news!

Your humble narrator has just passed his UK driving test, turning his green license into a pink one. Free on the roads for a much more reasonable price!

So how does the British test shape up to the American? Pretty damn well.

The American license allows the driver to drive manual or automatic regardless of what car was used in the test, so why bother trying to pass in a manual when you can just use a point-and-shoot car?

The test itself consists of a few questions about the car (Where's the handbrake? How do you turn the lights on? etc) followed by a leisurely drive around the neighbourhood. If you obey the speed limit, take a look around once in a while, drive smooth, and can steer into an oversized parking spot you've got the yellow card that lets you loose on the unsuspecting roads of the USA.

The British test, on the other hand, needed practice. Not only did I have to beat out the bad habits and learn to drive without crossing my hands, but the test was twice as long, involved pulling over and starting off again at random intervals along with the maneuvers, and involved car knowledge.

My first test was in torrential rain and I failed before leaving the car park after failing to do a safety check. The questions were on preparation for a long car journey, the maneuvers were the reverse park and the turn in the road. I got two more majors - one for coming into junctions two fast, the other for pulling out at a roundabout when the traffic was too thick. But if I'd be there still if I hadn't - test driving isn't real driving.

My second test was in glorious sun on the 4th July. The thought of and all-out BBQ in the evening coupled with the warmth of the sun shot my confidence through the roof. I was asked to go under the hood and point out how to check and change the oil, no problem. I was asked how to check the tyre pressure and what pressure the tyres should be - unexpected, but done it enough with friends to know the routine. Maneuvers were the reverse park, the reverse around the corner, and the emergency stop. All done with great aplomb. My minors were mainly for being too courteous on the road (overcompensating after the last test) and a stupid, stupid mistake with the brake and clutch coming into the space a the end of the test. But it's done.

The BBQ was amazing.

Now I just need to get my grubby hands on a car...

The Stand

Howdy, howdy, howdy!

Last night I went with my flatmate to check out The Stand Comedy Club in Glasgow (credit to Henry Hill for the photo - http://www.panoramio.com/user/495439).

£2 entry for the new talent night. £2 well spent.

Granted, Tuesday nights are not ideal for a late night and a few drinks, but at that price you can't really complain. I must admit I thought the standard would be on a par with the price. I was wrong, so wrong.

There were a couple of acts that felt a bit desperate, as is bound to happen, but Frankie Boyle put in a surprise visit to test out some new material and the host was not only the Scottish comedian of the year, but the very same host from the Miss Earth competition (given a bit more free range). The quality of the whole show was very good, and the atmosphere was brilliant, even on a muggy Tuesday.

Check it out.

Muffin to Lose

Just a quick one tonight, partially 'cause I want to get to bed, partially 'cause I don't really let myself make this a food blog.

Zucchini Muffins: Carrot cake but green. I felt an urge to try this out - big in the States but unheard of here - and so I did. The recipe is as follows:

INGREDIENTS

• 3 cups grated fresh zucchini
• 2/3 cup melted unsalted butter
• 1 1/3 cup sugar
• 2 eggs, beaten
• 2 teaspoons vanilla
• 2 teaspoons baking soda
• Pinch salt
• 3 cups all-purpose flour
• 2 teaspoons cinnamon
• 1/2 teaspoon nutmeg
• 1 cup walnuts (optional)
• 1 cup raisins or dried cranberries (optional)

METHOD

You don't need a mixer for this recipe.

1 Preheat the oven to 350°F (175°C). In a large bowl, mix together the sugar, eggs, and vanilla. Mix in the grated zucchini and then the melted butter. Sprinkle baking soda and salt over the mixture and mix in. In a separate bowl, stir together the flour, cinnamon, and nutmeg. Add these dry ingredients to the zucchini mixture. Fold in the walnuts and dried raisins or cranberries if using.

2 Coat each muffin cup in your muffin pan with a little butter or vegetable oil spray. Use a spoon to distribute the muffin dough equally among the cups, filling the cups up completely. Bake on the middle rack until muffins are golden brown, and the top of the muffins bounce back when you press on them, about 25 to 30 minutes. Test with a long toothpick or a thin bamboo skewer to make sure the center of the muffins are done. Set on wire rack to cool for 5 minutes. Remove muffins from the tin let cool another 20 minutes.

A big thank-you for the recipe, as found on http://simplyrecipes.com/recipes/zucchini_muffins/

Tastes very similar to carrot cake, has an amusing colour, and are very easy to make. My muffins were a bit dense - I'd recommend creaming the butter and sugar, giving the mix some time to rest, and using a decent oven.

I've also made some peanut butter flapjacks, but I find them too rich. Nothing to write home about.

That's it folks, short and just the right level of sweet.

Return of the Blog

Sorry folks!

As most of you know I have been without internet for a period of time. This makes blogging a wee bit harder. But I now have internet and so the blog goes on....

What to talk about? Should I talk about living in Glasgow, perhaps do a Glasgow/Edinburgh comparison? Should I talk about being a working stiff, having a real job at long last? Should I recount my visit to the shady world of Miss Earth, the eco-friendly beauty pageant? Should I talk on the drama of the chain walk, the Edinburgh College of Art show, my last minute trip to see Kirsten Hersh, the comedy of feeding people sour sweets? These have been busy days, full of ideal fodder for this blog. But old news doesn't seem to me to be in the spirit of the blog.

Semi-recent should be fine though: The 2009 British Grand Prix at Silverstone.

I was offered the pair of tickets won by the office (after they had filtered down of course, I know my place) to the Grand Prix on Thursday morning. The Grand Prix weekend started the next day. So I emailed my very special lady-friend who, after working out a basic plan, agreed to take the other ticket. And good tickets they were, too.

Long story short, nearest hotel we could get a room in was in Corby (a little over an hour away from the track) and, because we couldn't really set out before 9am Saturday, we missed the Friday warm-ups and the Saturday qualifiers (I was unaware that there is no access after about 2pm). Hotel was a very reasonable price, good quality too (thank you Premier Inn Corby). Wasn't overly enthused by the restaurant next door, but I shouldn't moan.

Up bright and early on Sunday, made the track by 8am. The day went as follows: 

8:20am: Formula BMW Second Race (13 laps). Almost seemed like adult go-karts zipping around the course. A good way to ease in the race day.

9:30am: GP2 Second Race (24 laps). Exciting stuff. A good amount of overtaking, a couple of minor incidents (mostly tire issues as they try to make the tires last the whole race).

10:30am: Hotdog. I was impressed. That was the best hotdog I have ever had at a big outdoor event. And, at £5, it bloody well should have been.

10:45am: Porsche Mobil 1 Supercup Race (14 laps). A lot of fun. I wasn't expecting much but this was perhaps the most interesting race of the day. Close competition, aggressive driving, last minute excitement, it was all I expect of a race.

11:30am: Formula One Drivers Track Parade. The drivers cruising around the track on a big truck. Not really much else to say about it.

11:45am: Formula One Starting Grid Presentation. I think this was the parade of ladies who passed us with flags. Encouraged a wolf-whistling competition amongst the classier gents in the crowd.

11:45am: 2 Seater Demonstration (1 Flying lap). Or toilet break if you're me. Man, those sardines-style urinals are desperate. I caught the very end of it though.

12:00pm: Air Display The Red Arrows. Jaw-dropping. Top-notch stuff.

12:46pm: National Anthem. So good it had everyone out of their seats.

1pm: 2009 Formula 1 British Grand Prix (60 laps). If you didn't already know, Vettel dominated. Right from lap 1. An amazing drive. Not a huge amount of excitement in the race, but not every race can be a nail-biter. Thank goodness Shell were kind enough to stick earplugs in with the ticket. It was constant, unbearable noise. Half from the cars, half from the airhorns (more on this later). Those cars go fast. So fast that the make the course look tiny. It was a real experience to see 'em first hand, but I don't think I'm enough of a motor enthusiast to go again. Unless there's another rouge pair of free tickets...

(3pm: Historic Car Challenge Race (12 laps) and 3.45pm Air Display RAF Typhoon Air Display)

I put these last two in brackets because, though I wanted to see them (esp. the historic cars), we decided to get an early start up the road as it was a long drive home with work waiting on Monday. About 90% of everyone else did the same. We watched what we could of the Typhoons in the queue to get out, and it was another hour before we got to the M1, a drive that should take only about a quarter of an hour.

A few last thoughts on the event: 

i)TV gives you a better view, but not the awe-inspiring experience of the cars up close.

ii)Airhorns should be illegal. Beating up annoying so-and-sos with airhorns should not only be legal, but encouraged.

iii)Event food should be at least on a standard with what was on offer there, but better prices would be nice.

iv) Merchandise should not cost that much. £25 for a baseball cap isn't funny, £8 for a lanyard is beyond the joke.

v)Get some better ideas for traffic control. Seriously, it's not rocket science that opening all 4 lanes to outgoing traffic will not speed the flow when said road joins other roads and stops people getting in. Directing 75% of the traffic down one road instead of %50 on each is just plain dumb.

vi)Earplugs are essential for these events.

I could probably go on, but you all have lives to get on with and I want to get to bed. I will leave you with one final thought:

When eating in Burger King, don't go for burgers without veg. The whopper or chicken royale are your best bets. And the onion rings aren't worth it.

As The Minutes Fade Away

The To-do-before-you-die list, the Bucket list, what a classic! Everybody has their own take on it, some record their dreams, some record their targets, some just record some things they like the idea of going. I'm in the last category. My list is a series of realistic ideas, some targets, some fun things to do. So what do I think my current (these lists should be dynamic, organic, growing and changing with ones tastes and ideals) list should be? Read on...

• Own Property - doesn't everyone want a little place to call their own? I'm not looking to build a property portfolio or anything, just have a place for me and mine

• Be a healthy BMI - This is for my own good. I shouldn't even have to put this onto the list.

• Road Trip USA - A classic. The land of driving seems to be the most appropriate place to undertake this age-old (okay, maybe not that old) tradition.

• Drive Highway 1, Bottom To Top - This would also tick off the entry above. This has got to be one of the best ways to experience sunny CA.

• Drive Manual - Officially. I can do it, just want to get that lovely pink card giving me credit for it.

• Visit 20 Countries - I think it's important to see new places, different cultures. 'Nuff said.

• Go On A Wine Tour - Just a wee one. Some friends, a bit of booze - it's all good.

• Cook A Heston Blumenthal Perfect Meal - This is to provide some incentive to spend days in the kitchen and buy all the specialist equipment and ingredients. I'll probably make the burgers, see it they're as good as mine.

• Get Promoted - I don't plan on being the bottom of the heap all my life.

• Read The Whole Bible - Or, indeed, any other holy text. This sort of reading in both enlightening and interesting.

• Read War And Peace - The novel of good intent. Will I fail to finish like so many others?

• Do Community Work - And not by court order. Just some local volunteer work. Good for you, good for others.

• Make Successful Croissants - A classy effort in the kitchen. I need to atone for those short-crust dog droppings I sculpted after a day of effort last time.

• Make A Superman Costume - Everybody loves Superman.

• Go To Oktoberfest - A touristy thing, but the epic celebration of beer should be an experience to remember.

• Plant A Tree - Preferably on my own piece of land. A tree that grows me food would be even better.

• Grow A Vegetable Garden - Doing my bit for the environment as well as cutting my food bills, bettering my diet, and getting me outdoors.

• Have A Chili Con Carne Cook-off - Great food, a bit of competition, something I've been meaning to do.

• Eat At A Michelin Starred Restaurant - I've already done this (at Number One, Edinburgh for my 21st birthday meal), but would love to do it again. Expensive, but an amazing experience for those who love food (who doesn't?).

• Learn To Ice Skate/Rollerblade Properly - It's a lot of fun which I imagine would be a good deal better when I'm not hauling myself off the ground half the time.

That's my list currently. It doesn't include all my hopes and dreams, it just provides an achievable checklist for my inspiration, be it for motivation, leisure, or to provide me with entertainment in a dull moment (if such things exist).

Looking again at this list, I wonder what it says about me. It is said that people often reveal more of themselves through writing than they intend. Writing this list, somewhat personal to begin with, must reveal all sorts of things about me, not that I could really, effectively unpick my own psyche. No matter.

What are you putting on your list?

The Cryptic Crusader: End of Days

So the last day of The Cryptic Crusader was Tuesday and I haven't blogged about it until today. Terrible.

So my last cryptic crossword to dissect for this blog did not go well. No clues. None. So much for going out with a bang. I'll keep trying, working at mastering this king of puzzles. Sorry to all those people who tuned in for amateur views, but this was just something for me to try out.

I'll be moving and starting a job soon, so don't expect too much on this blog over the next week - it's going to be a busy one for me.

Next post: The to-do-before-you-die list. Everybody loves a list, right?

The Cryptic Crusader vs The Long Weekend

I did attempt the cryptics over the weekend (not the big one - I did the quick clues on that one) but didn't devote much time to them, hence not having amazing results to report (about 4 clues on each).

I have had time to attempt the Monday cryptic, number 24,210. My attempts are clearly paying off - 11/28.

A laird's poet's rewritten poem (8, 4)

Rewritten, A laird's poet's becomes Paradise Lost, a poem. Viola!

Series of soldiers controlled Kansas (5)

Gotta watch those states in cryptic clues - easy way to get pairs of letters into the clue. Kansas becomes KS. 'Series of soldiers'? With the R at the start (from a down clue), controlled could be ran, hence the answer in ranks.

After signal to stop limousine, pretty regularly see VIP on this? (3,6)

What do you see a VIP on that is (3,6)? Red carpet. Does this fit? Signal to stop = red, limousine = car, pretty to pet? Maybe pet as a term of endearment. Good enough.

Connective material soldier put back inside... (8)

From the letters already in and 'connective material' I went for ligament.

Pair encountering dragon move forward (8)

Pair = pr, dragon=monster which can be ogre or, to fit with 'move forward' ogress, making progress. Exactly what I'm making with my cryptic mindset. Getting used to the methods.

Produce document again, in entirety, perhaps (6)

Pretty easy, this one. Produce document again = retype, which appears in entirety, perhaps as highlighted above.

Country girl's study (7)

I liked this one. Country = Peru, girl = Sal, study = perusal. Classic cryptic.

Smallest of family, a male, very thin, allowed to undergo punishment (3,3,8)

This was another good one. Smallest of the family = runt, a male = he, very thin = gaunt, allowed = let. To run the gauntlet is to be punished. The punishment involves being forced to run between two rows of soldiers who proceed to beat you as you pass.

Hurry up! Ale keg has split (5,1,3)

Split here means mix up the letters. 'Ale keg has' becomes shake a leg. This is the first clue to jump out at me today - the number (5,1,3) made this so much easier.

In a cricket match, time to declare (6)

A cricket match is a test. To declare is to attest. The Times are nice enough to throw the occasional easy clue my way.

Louder! State your views firmly (5,2)

Speak up! I don't think I need to explain this one.

The rest are beyond me so I'll go and take a gander at http://community.livejournal.com/times_xwd_times, a splendid site to help learn cryptics. Thank you to petebiddlecombe (petebiddlecombe) for putting me onto the site, instantly improving my cryptic ability. Getting to know the mind of the crossword setter is important. Hopefully I'll soon be filling the entire grid solo, but it'll take practice.

The Return Of The Cryptic Crusader

Last picture of me in the suit, seriously. I'm not sure if I'll be able to show my face in public if I put too many of these up.

Day 3: Some success at Times Crossword 24,208. Not much, but some.

Quicker way to stop circuit court imprisoning you in hearing (5,3)

After some thought, some connecting clues, and no solid logic I came to the conclusion that the answer for this clue was short cut.

Piano solo's beginning, frequently (4)

Read as 's beginning' and frequently=oft, therefore the answer is soft. Oh yeah.

Financial wrongdoing concealed by boards I'm on? Yes (6)

Concealed = look for the word in the clue. Simony (-the buying or selling of ecclesiastical privileges, for example pardons or benefices) happens to be a financial wrongdoing. Sussed.

Artist repeatedly stopping at Biblical mount (6)

I'm not sure how good your knowledge of Biblical mounts is, but Ararat is the supposed landing place of Noah's Ark. You got that one too? Excellent.

Successful period that could make one ladyfied (5, 3)

Ladyfied? Suspicious. It just so happens to contain all the letters to make field day - a successful period. Coincidence? I think not.

A party connected with, e.g., American red or blue state (8)

A party = a do. American red or blue = color. Connected they make Colorado, a state.

Sit there, improperly in casual wear (3, 5)

'Sit there' mixed about ('improperly') becomes tee shirt, an item of casual wear. Score another one for The Cryptic Crusader.

Meat cooked in two ways for sporting colleague (4-4)

Meat? Two ways? A sporting colleague? Why, it's a team-mate of course!

Breaking off due to strain of second trial (8)

Second = S, trial = hearing, put 'em together and you get shearing - breaking off due to strain.

Golding's novel released before autumn (4, 4)

Released = free, autumn = fall (for Americans). Hence the clue refers to Free Fall, the 1954 novel by William Golding about a renowned artist going mad in a prisoner of war camp.

Part of Henry IV, as a last resort, included in some folios (8)

Now my reasoning for this is not really acceptable, but it fits in with other clues and is very close. A last resort might refer to a fail safe. A character in Henry IV is Sir John Falstaff. That's enough to satisfy me.

11 clues, and weak ideas for many of the rest (29 clues in today's puzzle). A marked improvement on my past performance. Stay tuned folks!

The Cryptic Crusader: Dark Days

Day 2 of my week of cryptics. Whilst my day was mostly spent with people who solve problems that are really a matter of life and death (at a hospital), I still had an evening to peruse the answers of yesterday - I'll update yesterday's blog post to include answers - and face today's cryptic monster.

Long story short - not a single clue. I'm clearly not cut out for this, but my determination might have me crack it in time. Will friday be my lucky day?

The suit probably didn't help.

The Dawn of The Cryptic Crusader

Happy Earth Day everyone! It's like a bEarthday celebration for our planet (couldn't resist) so recycle, cycle, turn the heating down, take shorter showers, turn off lights - you know the drill. Shame on you if you're not doing these things already. Let's do our bit to ensure a better future.

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No it's... The Cryptic Crusader!

I like to think of myself as a bit of a puzzle aficionado, dabbling in sudokus, kenkens, fukoshiki, codewords, quick crosswords, all the good stuff, but I have never been able to crack the pinnacle of newspaper puzzling, the cryptic crossword. The king of these is widely regarded to be the Times Crossword. I am a big fan of The Times. When looking for a paper, I opt for The Guardian or The Times. Both cover real news, have interesting asides, and contain simple pull-out magazines with puzzles and quick reading for the busy days. The Times, however, provides more puzzles (including the fantastic Saturday crossword) - 3 sudokus (1 killer), 2 crosswords (1 quick, 1 cryptic), a polygon, trivia questions, a mini sudoku, a workout, a kenken, and a codeword. Fantastic. So, when I decided to become the Cryptic Crusader for a week, to conquer all paper puzzles, I was glad to have an excuse to be picking up The Times every day.

What prompted this, do you ask?

The Times2 supplement on March 26th 2009 encouraging people to face their fears, banish their excuses, and face the dreaded cryptic crossword. Armed with their guide, a mug of coffee, a biro, and my wits, I will become The Cryptic Crusader, striving to solve cryptics for the good of... well... my puzzling ability. Strap in, it's gonna be wild!

The Clues for puzzle 24,206:

 One American without land vehicle who made unwise flight?

No idea. (Icarus)

Vulgar home, dive son escapes from

Still nothing. (Indecent)

Most welcoming table - any number can tuck in

I see a pattern developing here... (Snuggest)

Venture penetrates deepest river

Tee-hee... (Strive)

Water-loving type takes in fluid, shy sort

Sigh... I am trying, really. I can't really type my thoughts as I go and wouldn't want to embarrass myself anyway. Tomorrow's cryptic reflections are going to be presented differently - I'm wasting space here. (Wallflower)

Stare at headless phantom

Ghost, spook without a letter? Shade? Or is it 'stare at' minus a letter? I can't think of a 4 letter word for phantom. 4 letter for stare - gape, peer, ogle, gaze or gawk? (Ogle)

Low spirits as catastrophe returns

This will be getting really boring to read. I'll only write the ones I get right tomorrow. (Mood)

Let's wrap this up. I'll keep at the rest of these clues, you can go spend your life on better things than this blog post. Or sit and wonder about the post coming tomorrow. That's good too.

The other clues:

Beast taking in pub with nothing on (Barbary Ape)

Part of winner's prize shortly to be received by a model (Apostrophe)

Writer unhappy about Chopin's end? (Sand)

Bridge partners at table drinking pop (Soda?) (Span)

Like very critical PhD examiner's bit of argument? (Antithesis)

Cannot greeting come from the corners of the eyes? (Canthi)

A king seen by everyone in court as a wild beast (Wallaroo)

Period of schooling at home, a learner's last (Terminal)

Long time in depression? Get a psychologist! (Good advice!) (Piaget)

Insect has a look inside vessel for fruit (Cantaloup)

Feted revolutionary is full of wind (Regaled)

Ask for short interview (See)

Interested in having wife as companion for journey (In Tow)

A mastermind worked out possible subject of international agreement (Disarmament)

Superficial and contemptible person, remorseful but lacking heart (Cursory)

Orange that is regarded with complacency (Navel)

Champion of freedom has energy and time variously absorbed by bookkeeper (Libertarian)

Final hope for cad (End?) (Rip)

One being bound to criticise that lot in tights (Pantihose)

Tear out manuscript repaired in private room (Sanctum)

Composer stirred man's tea (Maestro? or an actual composer? Could be Julius Eastman, especially as Eastman is an anagram of man's tea.) (Smetana)

Shallow vessel in South American river (Canoe?) (Plate)

Keep changing what's on bottom to get drier (Towel)

Comrade turning up for revolution (Lap)

I haven't got any so far! This is awful, even for me. Maybe after seeing today's answers in tomorrow's paper I'll be inspired for the Thursday cryptic, number 24,207. I blame it on not being in the suit.

You doing better than me?

The Old Patagonian Express

I've not been blogging for a while as my computer was away being repaired and for that I'm sorry to any faithful readers. It did, however, give me a chance to finish The Old Patagonian Express by Paul Theroux. I do not plan to review this book here as I have not the literary experience to do it justice, nor the wish to dissect the pleasure of reading the book. I merely offer some brief thoughts on the book for your consideration.

"Beginning his journey in Boston, where he boarded the subway commuter train, and catching trains of all kinds on the way, Paul Theroux tells of his voyage from ice-bound Massachusetts and Illinois to the arid plateau of Argentina's most southerly tip. Sweating and shivering by turns as the temperature and altitude shoot up and down, thrown in with the appalling Mr Thornberry in Limón and reading nightly to the blind writer, Borges, in Buenos Aires, Theroux vividly evokes the contrasts of a journey 'to the end of the line'."

The blurb sums up the book, but doesn't do it nearly the justice it deserves. It is, as I feel a blurb should be, a taster that doesn't give away any of the greater treats in store. Starting with his justifications for his style of writing, his feelings on travel writing and the purpose of a travel novel, he works interesting personal views and literary references (which, if you're anything like me, will leave you wanting to get your hands on the quoted works) into his descriptions of the peoples and places he encounters. 

The descriptions of life and society through South America were interesting, and leave me wondering if much has changed in the 30 years since the book was published. I find his accounts of passing through the countries, from shanty towns through tourist traps, and the people he encounters along the way, much more honest and stark than some other travel writing, which is probably why I find his works are that cut above so many others in the genre.

An excellent travel writer (I'm not forgetting his other works, I just haven't strayed beyond his travel writing so couldn't possibly comment), I recommend any of his works on the subject. Interesting routes, beautifully written, highly entertaining - do you need any more encouragement? 

Get Psyched Mix

"People often ask me, 'Barney, how is it that you're so psyched so much of the time?' And the answer is right here, my own personal Get Psyched Mix.

Now people often think a good mix should rise and fall but people are wrong. It should be all rise baby! Now prepare yourselves for an audio journey into the white-hot centre of adrenaline! Bam!" - Barney Stinson, How I Met Your Mother

This quote, this episode, behooves me to make my own Get Psyched Mix. Barney's actual mix (as seen on the cover of the case) is as follows:

1) I Wanna Rock -- Twisted Sister
2) You Give Love A Bad Name -- BJ (Bon Jovi)
3) Lick It Up -- KISS
4) Paradise City -- GNR (Guns & Roses)
5) Dancing With Myself -- Billy Idol
6) Rock You Like A Hurricane -- Scorpy (Scorpions)
7) Panama -- Van Halen
8) Talk Dirty To Me -- Poison
9) Thunderstruck -- AC/DC
10) Dr. Feelgood -- Crue (Motley Crue)
11) Round and Round -- Ratt

(http://www.tvsquad.com/2005/12/20/barneys-get-psyched-mix/)

My mix, obviously, is somewhat different. I compiled a (by no means exhaustive) list of about 40 songs that get me going, narrowed it down to 23, and ordered it as best I could. This mix activity is not something I'm used to, I'm a confessed shuffle listener.

Anyway, enough build-up, this is my personal Get Psyched Mix:

1) Prelude - Pendulum

2)Requiem for a Tower, Movement 2 - Corner Stone Cues

3)Requiem for a Tower, Movement 3 - Corner Stone Cues

4)Requiem for a Tower, Movement 4 - Corner Stone Cues

5)Lift - Poets of the Fall

6)You Give Love a Bad Name - Bon Jovi

7)Harder Better Stronger Faster - Daft Punk

8)Hash Pipe - Weezer

9)Man With The Hex - The Atomic Fireballs

10)Time Is Running Out - Apollo 440

11)Throw Away Your Television - Red Hot Chili Peppers

12)Anxiety - Black Eyed Peas

13)Locking Up The Sun - Poets of the Fall

14) Jesus Walks - Kanye West

15) Long Way To Fall - Autopilot Off

16)Major Tom - I Hate Kate

17)No One Knows - Queens of the Stone Age

18)Slam - Pendulum

19)Diamonds and Guns - Transplants

20)Open Your Eyes - Goldfinger

21)To The End - My Chemical Romance

22)Out of Control - Hoobastank

23) Welcome To The Black Parade - My Chemical Romance

I hope this inspires you to select the tracks that get you riled, stick 'em a CD and get psyched!

The Perfect Brownie

I decided that my first meaningful post should be my struggle to achieve the perfect, gooey, rich brownie. I had envisioned the task taking weeks, having to make many batches of brownies to try all the variations. It didn't. Type 'Perfect Brownies' into Google and hit 'I'm feeling lucky'. That simple. I did try other recipes, but I can't see any way to improve it.

Here's the recipe:

8 tbsp unsalted butter (1/2 cup 0r 110g)
4 oz (120g) unsweetened chocolate
1 1/4 cups sugar
1 tsp vanilla extract
1/4 tsp salt
2 eggs
1/2 cup all purpose flour
2/3 cup walnuts or pecans (optional)

Preheat the oven to 400F and line and 8-inch square metal baking pan with foil.
Melt the butter and the chocolate together, on top of a double boiler or in the microwave, stirring often until smooth. Stir in sugar, vanilla and salt. Add eggs one at a time, followed by flour. Stir until very smooth, about 1 minute. Add nuts, if using.
Scrape batter into prepared pan and bake at 400F/200C/Gas 5 for 20 minutes.

(http://bakingsheet.blogspot.com/2006/01/cooking-school-perfect-brownies.html)

I tried using a glass dish for baking the brownies, which did not work well at all. The recipe says you should put the brownies in an ice bath right out of the oven, but it's not essential. I just put it on a cooling rack, out of the hot pan, and they were just as moist. When it comes to brownies, my dear friends, moistness is a desideratum.

What about other additions? People put all sorts of nuts, fruits, and spices in their brownies but, being a man of simple tastes, I prefer just to have walnuts, chocolate chunks or, if I'm feeling the need, raspberries. With a fool proof recipe like this, it's easy to just stick whatever you feel like into the mix.

Go ahead folks, get your brownie technique honed before the BBQ season hits! I reckon brownies should be served warm with a scoop of good quality vanilla ice cream. Perfect.

Thanks to Mike for the photography, stay tuned for Al's Psyche Mix, coming soon!

Opening Words

I said I wouldn't, I said I shouldn't, yet here I am blogging again. Not in the photo, but you get the idea.

I guess everyone has an ego to feed, especially these days. It is so easy to feel insignificant in a world of 7,000,000,000 people on a tiny rock orbiting a small star in a galaxy of 200-400 billion stars and blogging, thinking people care what you think/say/do, might help to relieve the feeling of pointlessness that such a train of thought can inspire.

I'm going to pretend this blog has a purpose. It won't be like my last blog, covering every last detail of my day-to-day drag. I plan to only post if I try something new, something new tries me (no innuendo intended, but feel free to giggle), or if I get the particular urge to share a particular experience/rant/thought.

As this blog is not anonymous, I'm unlikely to fill it with embarrassing things so if you've wandered off the beaten path of the internet and hope to find a sexy, outré, deliciously devilish commentary on life and society, keep moving. This is likely to be boring...

Finally - if you see spelling/grammar errors, want to challenge me to something, or just get me to blog on a topic close to your heart, just comment or email me and I'll give it a bash. Saves me pestering the muses.

Please remember all views/opinions expressed in this blog are mine and, as such, should not be taken too seriously despite their unquestionable veridicality.