Golf must have more quotes relating to it than any other sport. Most famous, as above, is by Mark Twain. Did I agree with him? I had to find out.
Myself and three other upstanding gentlemen unleashed a very special brand of terror on the unsuspecting Strathtyrum Golf Course: 4.50pm on that gorgeous Saturday evening saw the four of us (99% yours truly) slicing balls, hacking rough, breaking tees, and digging holes in sand pits (many apologies, bunkers).
I am no golfer, that much is sure. I need to focus on my technique - I have the most ridiculous swing ever allowed on a golf course and a grip that would make golf tutors worldwide weep. I think it can be summed up best by legendary golfer Sam Snead - "If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death." I'd probably gore fellow diners while I was at it, I certainly would've been a menace to many a golfer that day had my wise old friend not booked the last tee time possible.
After marching around in the rough for four and a half hours looking for my balls (ho ho - there is no was golf can be written about without leaving openings for innuendo) - the game was more a Where's Waldo (or Wally for the strange Brits) for golf balls - we claimed the 18th hole just before the sun called it a day.
I enjoyed myself - obviously it'd be more fun if I had tried a bit harder to learn - and disagree with Mark Twain. In this day and age it's hard enough to draw some people out of the house, yet alone to tramp for miles with heavy clubs (for those man enough to shoulder their own load) in all weathers. I believe it's an excuse for a walk flavoured with a bit of competition.
Maybe I'll get lessons, play a bit more, perhaps I won't. But I encourage you all not to stick your noses up. You might just have fun...
"Golf is so popular simply because it is the best game in the world at which to be bad." ~A.A. Milne
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